Note: left pic is filter on FB live – I don’t normally wear a tiara. On the right is an older pic and not the best quality (ahem, no digital back then). Both smiles are pure me.

I was reminded tonight how often we can stress or overly identify with no pain no gain. When did the notion sprout that what naturally lights us up, our joy, isn’t the guideposts for the right now’s and the next steps?


Instead of tapping into what flows, naturally from what feels right, we plan and calculate and goal post. We mistrust that we know the way. We cut ourself off  from the very well-spring that guides us, always.


This isn’t to say you won’t ride passed the edge of ease as you lean into what you desire to learn or experience, courting discomfort. However, at the same time you will feel the flow even then if you open up to allow yourself to really connect and express.


This pic is of me leaning into the knowing that I needed to work on getting comfortable in videos. Live videos to be exact. The thought, previously, made me want to vomit. So yeah, not so much joy in thinking about it, however, when I allowed myself to get out of my head and let the words sift up, I forgot all the perceptions about how it’ll be received and simply gave.


I gave my words, my thoughts and my stories. Me. And I loved it. 


I started small, only going live in a small private Facebook group. Then I expanded to a larger Facebook group I created for Forty Mornings. I, finally, went live on my profile page and have many more to come as video is a better way to connect.


What I love about videos is it’s a stream of photos and you can’t always see how you “look”. But if you take screen shots you can see all the goofy and weird expressions you make.


Sometimes, like the above, you see a wide smile slip that reminds you of the smiles you used to share when younger. Proof of the pure unencumbered joy within complete with a toothy grin and dimpled cheeks.


Today I met up with a local artist, Rachael Rice, to discuss cover art for my book: Forty Mornings. It wasn’t a goal or anything planned other than I adore her work; it brings me joy. The idea surfaced to have her help create a cover. So I reached out and I’m so thankful I followed that even though I know nothing about commissioning art work for a project.


Tonight I participated in a live Intuition Intensive with Jess Lively. I didn’t have this on my list of things to do in 2018, I simply read the email and received a few nudges. I knew being on camera as she probed my intuition wouldn’t be comfortable as folks watched, but still I listened and showed up. Something was pulling me there even if I logically didn’t understand why.


You might say, “But where is the joy in that? You didn’t feel comfortable?”


The truth is, when I slipped out of the thoughts about what others thought and settled into chatting about what came through as well as the topics I adore around consciousness and healing,  I understood it was for those moments of our cracked open hearts and minds connecting, that pulled me in. I radiated my presence. I wore my joy.


There is a part of us that knows, inherently, where to go and how to go about doing it and it doesn’t have to hurt or bog us down.


There is no slogging with soul. 


There may be discomfort but often if you can recline in your mind and allow yourself to open up the sliding door and allow how you really feel, not think, but feel shine through you’ll be surprised at what really lights you up; what brings you joy.


I believe joy is our soul smiling. Why wouldn’t you lead with that?


You don’t have to personally develop yourself, you don’t have to finish x,y, or z, you don’t need to heal or let go.


You already are who you need to be right now. Relax into that. Breathe. Then show up for what calls you and let yourself open to and follow your joy.